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Expect a very diverse set of responses, as this may draw some very strong and disparate opinions.

For the most part, yes you are right.  Traditional courships and marriages seem to be a thing of the past.  As for age, well, some will say people married off at ages of 14 and 16 in ye olde days, but people also lived much shorter lives so that's not really a fair comparison to the last century or so.  I think sex is so overly promoted in this day because it's the most effective marketing tool in existence.  Since sex is no longer a "taboo" subject it's gone the opposite extreme - you cannot escape it anywhere.  Advertisements carry sexual undertones.  "Buy this product and you'll get sex with someone".  It's not spoken outright, but the message is clear when you see a commercial for a mens' aftershave and some female in lingerie is crawling all over this muscular male.  The sad thing is so much of it works.  How many suckers buy herbal "male enhancement" supplements like Enzyte, etc?

I find it all distasteful and vulgar myself.  Sex is not an expression of love or even an act of procreation for humans now.  It's become a game, and people are used as toys for fulfilling each others lusts.  Love is something forgotten, its meaning lost amidst the shallow fast living and cheap throw-away attitudes.  Humans don't respect each other, and so they use each other all the time.

I would say for yourself, be glad you understand that things can and should be different.  Don't ever let anyone tell you that you're being too "old fashioned" or living in the past.  Don't ever let those who would pressure you to be like them suck you down to their level.  Be content that you're standards are higher, and seek out others who hold to similar standards.

First of all, that's a wonderful Freudian slip in the first sentence of your post. Kudos!

Secondly, this might well turn out to become a CC-topic, but you never know which way it goes.

Thirdly, a response.
I agree that there's weird shit going on. I'm reading more about special 'gangbang' parties, where girls have sex with a group of boys they've never met. Sometimes they seem to do this in trade for booze, sometimes just for a ride, often for status. I've also heard of the 'blowjob-competitions' that were (are?) popular at US frat parties. Frankly, I think it's silly and pointless, more than anything else. On top of that, it's dangerous.

What an 'act of love' is, I'm not able to decide for anyone else. For me, it's very much dependent on the context. I'm sure there are people out there ready to give their strict definition of it, but not me. I certainly have my limits though, even if a bit of fun between the sheets with no strings attached is not out of the question.

In the good old days, when I was a wee lad like yourself ;], I was pretty serious too. No fun at all though, so that wasn't much good either. I guess the 'middle of the road' is still a good place to be walkin'. But hey, I'm no casanova, and maybe a 'nerd'-forum isn't the best place to be asking? :]

Love is lost to all but a select few these days... in this area anyway. Even when I'm at work listening to people talk, it sickens me.. altho they ARE honest at least. They don't want someone to love and care about.. they don't want to put up with that relationship shit.. they just want a f***buddy.

Personally, my views on the subject are much the same as your own. I have to love somebody and care about who they are... someone who also shares the same views as myself on the subject, or at least have a respectable view themselves. I didn't even think such a person existed until a little over a year ago.. and I must say, it's the best feeling in the world to actually know you are loved.

I've been known to type long rants about this subject on my LJ, and about how I want the world to suffer because of it... but I'll actually spare this one.

For once I have to agree with Tabun on this. Everything in life should have a balance. I don't like it when people preach of  "Sex is evil an immoral" same with people who preach "wild orgies or bust".

People now days have no sense of self control. After all we live in a society where the truth is relative, so of course shit like this is bound to happen and it's just going to get worse.

don't have that


well , this is actually funny , I don't have a relationship with a girl.
But I do have lots of girls , and the fun part is they know about eachother. :D

So GK and Plague are whores.. awesome!

omg name calling... oh noes!

Whatever

hey... I have an excuse... ima late bloomer... I can be as whorish as I choose!
 :ownage:


besides.. we all know GK is lying... he doesn't know any girls... heh
 <3

Well when you get to the point of... whatever relationships have turned into, the only difference that i can see is how you got to where you are.

So would you rather feel completely alone and isolated in a sinking pit of despair because you've humped anything that moves and not formed any kind of lasting relationship...

OR!  would like to feel completely alone and isolated in a sinking pit of despair because unlike the many people you see you at least try to have some respect for your fellow humans and refuse to treat anyone as a (CENSORED) warmer and actually want some sort of lasting meaning experience?

so yep either way joo are pwnt, thats life no one said it didn't suck

Or instead of being so damned negative, perhaps actually try to make a life together and weather the storms, "for better or for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death you do part"?

Oh, why do I bother!  Maybe I'm just kidding myself thinking that maybe, just maybe people can understand what it means to be committed to someone else and have them committed to you.  Everyone's so convinced it can't happen, well maybe you're right!  Who am I to tell people what love is?  After all, I'm just a dumb animal, so go on and live your "enlightened" and "free" lives however you wish.

I understand completely, and I agree with your post fully as well. I think I'm one of the lucky ones who found someone who also understands. Odd thing is tho.. up until September of last year, I didn't think it could happen.. but.. it did, and I'm glad it did. I'm looking forward to many years...

Might have to become Canadian or something tho.. but, hey.

Uh I was trying to point out that both "methods" of life have thier downside... it's just when you feel that way is different

while i can't say i've experienced anything well... positive in the more romantic or physical sence i do believe in your all encompassing, understanding, and forgiving, and all together "perfect" love dispite not yet having found someone to share such feelings with... but hopefully sometime soon i'll find someone who'd forsake all others for me as i would for them...

but enough of my rambling i don't think i've seen anyone who doubts their mate and so cheats on them, but rather people who get confused as to who their heart is with and goes off and screws someone they think(?) they love.

and i think thats more than enough from me

I agree with Tabun's third point, but I still have a little something I'd like to bring to the table...

I think there is more sexuality in society for three (poorly supported) reasons.

1.)  I feel the internet helps people overcome social stigmatisms.  Some of it may be bad, some of it may be good, but the internet is a part of our day-to-day culture.  Younger people assume it's a given technology much like people from older generations assume TV's and automobiles are a given technology.

2.)  The AID's and STD's scare has come and passed.  This is both unnerving and enjoyable to me.  

Back in the late 1980's and early 1990's the AID's scare was huge!  I remember my mom and I being questioned by several security guards for giving some guy at a Halloween spook-house a raspberry, (I stuck my tongue out him and made a whoopie-coushin-like noise.)  They were afraid I had AID's.  (Florida has the highest AID's rate in the US or at least it did when I lived there.)

Fortunately, you don't hear of too many people getting AID's anymore.  Unfortunately, that still doesn't make one exempt.  I don't really have a problem with people who engage in private sex parties, but they damn well better be prepared for the risks.  Too many people think it'll happen to the "other guy."  You are everbody-else-on-the-planet's other guy!  That's 5,999,999,999 people who think you'll get AID's instead of them.

Other STD's have also become somewhat laughable.  Most have warning signs, some are curable, most if not all are treatable.  Too many people also have a carefree attitude about this.  I'd wager that most people afflicted with STD's other than AID's don't even bother to tell their partners about it.

3.)  Pregnancy takes an operation to fix.

If people have more abortions, the price to get an abortion will drop unless the amount of abortion clinics can not meet the demand.  (Note: I am neither for or against abortions.)

Kain is dead on to this. People not only want to have more sex, but they want to advocate all the consquences of it. I really don't know, after all, I'm just a dumb animal. ;)

Who lives the longest? people who get regular sex, or those who don't?

Nuns or Rockstars?

KNow which I'd rather be.

AIDS scare over?  Hardly. (http://reuters.myway.com/article/20060407/2006-04-07T233012Z_01_N07310796_RTRIDST_0_NEWS-LIFE-SANFRANCISCO-DC.html)  Now I know this is one city, and one demographic, but consider this, regardless of thoughts on sexual orientation.  You have people who are infected, who lead very sexually promiscuous lives.  Estimates are that one out of four of these are infected, and those are the ones who are being upfront about it.  This city also claims to be a model for a more "progressive" society, so for those who prefer this over a more traditional and conservative society, take a good look because you're seeing the future of social progressivism/liberalism.

Now expand this to different demographics.  Lets take a heterosexual population in a large city.  How many are infected?  How many know if they are?  How many are honest about it?  See, that's your problem, you don't know if that person you're taking to bed is honest or not.  If they're being adulterous, you know they're already as dishonest as you can possibly get, betraying a trust that they swore an oath to uphold.  So that's the risk you take.  Now consider this, for those of you who get "tested often".  Let's say you sleep around and manage to sleep with a statistic.  Then you sleep with four other people before the test comes back positive - remember, it takes time for infections to manifest and become detectible.  First off, you don't know when you got it.  Second, you've already killed 4 people in the process.

That's right, I said you killed them.  AIDS is fatal.  It's slow, yes, but it is still 100% lethal.  If you wouldn't kill someone by walking up to them and shooting them with a shotgun, why would you do it this way?  Dead is dead, and you're still responsible for ending that person's life.  I wonder if anyone who lives loosely stops and thinks of the damage they can do.  I know when it comes to drinking and driving a large number of people do not stop to think.  They value their booze more than other people's lives.  I don't see this kind of irresponsibility any differently.  The only difference is if you negligently run someone over while drunk you're criminally liable for homicide.  They don't jail people for negligently spreading a fatal disease.

People in this modern world think of biblical concepts of marriage and sex as restrictive and dictatorial.  I look at it this way.  I think God in His wisdom wrote such principles to try to protect people from themselves and from these diseases.  A married couple who retains monogamy can share both love of the spirit, and sexual pleasures without the fear or risk of a life-ending or life-shattering disease.  You build a life together, you share the joys of watching children grow and leave the nest, you grow old together.  You share your life in a kind of intimacy that you will never, ever know any other way.  Why people desire differently I will never understand, and frankly I don't think I ever want to.

I think of marriage as something else (bogus?), but that's a different topic all together. I do, however, fully believe and support monogamy.

wel , I already lok like a rockstar...
but other then the sex and hair , I dont do drugs, I don't drink a lot (females don't like drunk people )


BTW , rather a short life filled up with al the good stuff of life then a long life that is boring as hell .

The classic response that everybody in the modern world uses. Hey.. you're missing out on 'all the good stuff' by passing up drugs and alcohol abuse. Why stop with only sex? If you want a 'short life' that has 'all the good stuff', by all means.. go ahead and do drugs and get drunk! Your life is more boring without it, you know.

It's official, you aren't American.

not only is he not american... but he doesn't get laid very often either... girls LOVE to get drunk... at least most of the fun ones do... heh

 ;)

Games, you are mistaking the definition of the word "good" here.  If it leads to a short life it's probably not very good for you.  Besides, I can guarantee you that hell is anything but boring.  Being tormented for all eternity by your fellow inmates is certainly unpleasant, but never boring.  One also doesn't have to be boring just because they choose to avoid sin.  There's still plenty of things in life to keep you busy.

Games Keeper is definitely not American.  He's in Europe somewhere, forget exactly where though.  I think it's Belgium?

Mcdeth , trust me, nobody likes a drunk unless your drunk yourself


and why do you assume I go to hell just for having sex.

He didn't say you were going to hell... he was commenting on your remark that stated: "boring as hell".

Classic stuff. :)

I never said anyone was going to hell just for having sex.  Adultery and fornication - yes, those are kind of bad.  Have to repent of those two, or better yet, avoid them altogether.  Sex has its place and role, but this modern world has certainly perverted it beyond all reason.

You also said a "short life filled up with all the good stuff" was better than a long life that was "boring as hell."  I was simply stating that hell is not boring, as well as clearing up this misconception that avoiding sin - which leads to hell, btw - requires one to be boring and dull.  That is all the "good stuff" you're referring to, right?  Debauchery, fornication, and satiating one's lusts?  If not, well do please clarify it.  I do hate proceeding from misconceptions, but usually when someone says "I'd rather do x than live a long and boring life" they mean unwholesome things, so that's the assumption I'm proceeding from until you say otherwise.

Edit:  Spawn beat me to the punch.

Mayhaps there is a 'hell for bad spelling'? One wonders..

SpHell?  ;)

yes there is a hell for bad spellers.

My old schools in Wales and Scotland. I was punished for things I could not help.

It almost broke my sprit.

Now I have a Sat-Nav as I can't read road signs quick enough, and a computer to write letters on.

I don't want to put a downer onthe thread, but needed to say it. :D

How does GK get more than I do?

*sigh*...

man been ages since i posted in the forums here O_o btu thats besides the point....i know this thread is old but after reading it i HAVE to rant now.

if there is one thing im really getting sick of is getting judged for NOT having sex. -_- im really.....F!@$@!%$#@ING sick of it. last guy i told i was a virgin said "your denying yourself" and the guy before that "your depriving yourself". i dont NEED sex....if i thought i needed it THEN it would be deprivation >> but i dont. im not SHELTERED just because i dont engage in it. the world is full enough of STD's and all that over CRAP we don't need. Besides, I'd rather save myself for the right guy and people REALLY over look that. I'm not talking about the whole bid about finding yoru "soulmate". I just want to have it with someone i deeply care about who feels the same way AND WHEN WE'RE MARRIED! it doesnt have to be after marriage but id prefer it to be. if they're willing to wait after marraige that shows commitment, that they're not just there for sex. people over look that too.

*sighs* sorry just had to get that out. it just BOILS me up inside knowing all these freaking women who just have sex on the dot, HAVE A FREAKING ABORTION only to go F#@$ some more liek some slutty god D!#$ whore. -_- and people wonder why (no offense to any guys) but why MOST guys look at women as sex toys...BECAUSE THEY ACT LIKE ONE! god do you women have no MORALS? (again i dont mean any offense to anyone in here)....just im really sick of our society being so bent on something so....unecessary(sp?) only to turn around and get judged for not degrading myself to society's standards.

That's basicly my rant in a nutshell (that I've been avoiding), albeit from a guy's perspective. Many similarities tho.

It's not only guys who view the other gender as sextoys tho... I work with a few women who feel that way about men. Probably for the same reason tho. *shrug*

I would say most people think that way because they can't stand it if someone's not on the same level they are.  It's like when you have a student in a classroom who makes high grades while his peers are failing.  Something must be wrong with him or her for doing well, not with those who are failing.  This seems to be the prevailing attitude today.  Anyone who holds themselves to any kind of higher standard is ridiculed for it.  I think that makes the victory only greater when you refuse to give in to their influences.  Shakespeare wrote "This above all, to thine own self be true."  I think it's good advice.

whats REALLY too bad is when people fall under peer preasure as if they have no ground to stand on beyond the opinions of others.