Wirehead Studios

General Discussion => Rants and Randomness => Topic started by: Moshman on 2005-04-11, 22:05



Title: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Moshman on 2005-04-11, 22:05
Anyone got some more to add feel free. :)
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GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.


AL GORE: I invented the chicken. I invented the road. therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.

COLIN POWELL: Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

HANS BLIX: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

MOHAMMED ALDOURI: (Iraq ambassador) The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RALPH NADER: The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH: I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side. That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, The chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX: It was an historical inevitability.

VOLTAIRE: I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.

RONALD REAGAN: What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

SIGMUND FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2005, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one?


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Footman on 2005-04-11, 22:39
DOOM GUY: To get shotgunned. It's a demon, A DEMON I SAY!!


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Lordbane2110 on 2005-04-12, 14:31

Queen Victoria : the Chickens are not amused

Eddie Izzard : oooo CHicken, feel chicken, see chicken crossing road




Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Phoenix on 2005-04-12, 16:34
Phoenix:  Because old Farmer Brown is too blind and deaf to see the oncoming truck... and the chicken knows it.


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Moshman on 2005-04-12, 19:38
Little Washu :To have an interesting story to annoy people with on the fourm games.
Little Washu was shot dead by [Tabun].
Little Washu :Crap!
Little Washu :Why do we concern ourselves over that some chickens have the urge to cross....
Little Washu almost dodged [Tabun]'s rocket.
Little Washu :Asphault! :}
Little Washu sucks at this game.
Little Washu :You don't have to announce it.


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: McDeth on 2005-04-13, 06:38
McDeth: Oh look! It's Phoenix!



Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: games keeper on 2005-04-13, 13:10
games keeper : Lets cross the road and hunt that chicken .

Homer simpson : hmmm chicken


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Moshman on 2005-04-13, 15:56
A gothic phycopathic sadistic freak: I like chickens...


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Kain-Xavier on 2005-04-14, 11:58
Chicken: I chose to.


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Lordbane2110 on 2005-04-14, 12:03
Why do chicken cross roads, is it the lure of the road.  do they love the smell of asphelt in the morning


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Phoenix on 2005-04-14, 22:59
Caeser:  I came.  I saw.  I crossed.
Pontius Pilate:  I wash my hands of this chicken.
Simon Peter:  I tell you I don't know this chicken!
Darth Vader:  We meet again, Highway 1.  The circle is now complete.  When I crossed you I was but a fledgeling, now I am the master.
Nikita Khrushchev:  The chicken rose up to escape from the capitalist propaganda machine!
Mr. Spock:  It is only logical to assume the chicken was merely acting on instinct.
Charles Darwin:  Natural Selection determined that this chicken would cross the road successfully, thereby ensuring future generations of chickens would also share this trait of successful road crossing.
Farmer Brown (Post Humous):  That darn chicken had it in fer me!
Jurassic Park velociraptor:  We evolved into WHAT?!?


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: BiGRoB85 on 2005-04-16, 17:39
Philosopher:  How do you know that the chicken crossed the road?

Mathematician:  I can only prove that the chicken had a reason to cross the road; I can't determine what that reason was.


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Kain-Xavier on 2005-04-17, 08:12
Gatekeeper:  There is no chicken, only Zhoul.  :ninja:


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Footman on 2005-04-17, 18:18
CONFUSEDUS: To get me a couple dozen boxes of bagels and jars of peanut butter.


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: Phoenix on 2014-12-13, 23:02
Zombie Chicken:  Because I'm back from the dead.....




thread....


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: MadTux on 2014-12-14, 21:38
Nice. That's over ten years. Aarrgh!
/me runs away and hides


Title: Re: Why the Chicken Cross the road
Post by: J3E125 on 2015-01-03, 07:11
Caesar- When a chicken must prove his might, he let the die be cast!

Joe Biden- I wouldn't know what he'd say, but it'd be gold.